The Dealer
Boss · Native to the Couch-Lock Valley
This article is about the creature. For the region, see the Couch-Lock Valley.
The Dealer is a boss creature found in the Couch-Lock Valley. It has 5,200 hitpoints and hits for up to 80, placing it in the middle of the bestiary by hitpoints (#92 of 511).
It drops Blunt of Doom and 5 other items, and yields 2,200 experience and 3,000 coins on death. As a boss it attacks on the shortened 0.7-second cadence and announces its arrival in the message log.
Combat statistics
- HIT POINTS
- 5,200
- DAMAGE
- 80
- DPS
- ~114
- SPEED
- 10 / 22
- EXPERIENCE
- 2,200
- COINS
- 3,000
At 0.7 seconds a swing for 80, sustained contact costs roughly 114 health per second. The charge multiplier takes it from 10 to 22 while closing.
Behaviour
- Charges
- Multiplies its movement speed while closing mid-range distance, then drops back to base speed on contact. Freezing effects are the only reliable brake.
- Boss
- Attacks on a 0.7-second cadence instead of the standard 1.1, and announces itself in the message log on spawn. One instance may be alive in its region at a time.
Drops
| Item | Quantity | Rarity | Type |
|---|---|---|---|
| Blunt of Doom | 1 | Always | Weapon |
| Rasta Cap | 1 | Always | Armour |
| Hemp Vest | 1 | Always | Armour |
| Tie-Dye Joggers | 1 | Always | Armour |
| Dank Crystal | 8 | Always | Material |
| Stash of Cash | 3 | Always | Material |
Coins and experience are awarded separately and are not part of the drop table.
Location
The Dealer spawns inside the Couch-Lock Valley, a region of radius 18 centred on 165, 130. It occupies slot 3 of 3 on that spawn table, and being a unique boss it clears only 0.5% of rolls — and only when no other instance is alive. It shares the table with 3 other creatures.
Others on this spawn table
- Lazy Stoner 120 HP
- Bud Golem 420 HP
- Haze Warden 230 HP
Strategy
- Fight in contact or from well outside its approach band; the middle distance is where it doubles speed.
- Only one may be alive in the region at a time — clear the trash first so nothing adds mid-fight.
- At 80 a hit, two connected swings will end most unarmoured players. Armour matters more than damage here.